Friday, August 17, 2007

I'm alive

Today, I watched the sun rise over a wretched world. The thing is, the world didn't feel so terrible at the time. Because, today is a day, a beautiful day. A day to live, learn, laugh, lust, and lie. It's another day in a disgusting world filled with beautiful things.

And I'm okay with that. Me. Not one bit more, not one bit less. Just me. And I'm okay with that too.

Wednesday, May 2, 2007

A New Home

Recently, I've come to realize that there are actually people who read my blog, and I would just like to share with them how much I am absolutely thrilled by this. It's much easier to write when I know it will be read by someone.

Anyway, I have begun to look into moving The Inkblot to an independent site with various sections where I can showcase my artistic and literary works. The blog would continue of course, and I could alter the aesthetics to my liking, as well. In an y case, I have yet to receive information on possible expenses from Raelifin, so the idea is just a distant dream for now.
In my next post, if nothing else comes up first, I'll write up my plans for the Library of Alexandria.

Later folks,

~ T

Sunday, April 29, 2007

The Tides Of Change

This posting is my 20th on this blog. This Tuesday is my 17th birthday. This has been a great day.

My mind is a wanderer, in a world made of dreams. I let it wander, because only when left free can it experience the greatest possible plethora of emotions, ideas, and experiences. In two days, I will have wandered, coasted, been forced into climbing, and fallen down for seventeen years, and this is important to me. I have grown and changed a lot, and I can see this, which says something important. I may not be mature, but I'm getting closer. I may not be perfect, but I'm getting there. I may not be a good person, but as much as I hate to say it, I'm getting there.

Today may not be the pivotal day of change, but since when does life work out in a symmetrical and convenient way? Never. At least not for me. So today, I'm writing about me, and my philosophy.

Me: I am an artist. This means, not that I have any skill, but that I have the vision necessary to create works of literature and visual art, maybe even music. I'm not perfect, in any way. I don't think I'm beautiful, or kind, or free of guilt. I also don't have very high self-esteem either, but that's all okay. I'm a continuously growing entity, like everyone else, the product of my own mind and the world around me. Someday, I want to be better at what I do and feel better about myself, and as of this moment, I have faith in the fact that this will come to pass.

The Philosophy: I like to call my philosophy the Inkblot, as it incorporates many elements of this device. The general idea is that anything in the world can be understood in an infinite number of ways, and none of them are definitively the right way. Also, these interpretations allow an observer to understand the interpreter based on what he sees. Another idea is that since an inkblot is almost inherently random, there can be no process for understanding and dealing with them other than to take them as they come. From this concept comes my method of handling life, by observing and making individual decisions. My morals should be mutable, as well as my intentions, so long as what I do is sensible based on the information I have. in this way, I can live with no regrets.

The final note of the day goes out to my friends, few though they are.

To Raelifin, I would send thanks and goodwill, for being an altruistic and genuinely good person to the point of a fault. I sincerely hope life doesn't tear us apart as it has to so many others.

To Xathan, I want to thank for helping me cope with the world and all it's unpleasant truths. I dreamed of a day when we could have a game shop, and now I fear that may never be. However, you let me dream, and that's something of immeasurable value.

To NastyNate, I would thank for crushing my dreams. Someone had to do it, and you did it before they could. You're my hero for doing whatever the hell you feel like, and just not giving a shit about anything. If anything, you are a classhole, and I appreciate that.

Cameron gets the honor of being the one person who I wanted to be more than anyone else. You showed me an ideal, and then taught me to be myself. I want to thank you for putting up with me all of the years I bothered you, and for still acknowledging my existence after everything. Thank you.


Finally, we come to Elven Doritos. You and I have had a fickle relationship, filled with verbal abuse, intense competition, and a grudging respect under it all. Recently, issues have arisen that I am willing to share in the responsibility for. However, I want my friend back. You are the voice of reason, even if the reason is humorous.

That's all folks, goodnight.

~ T

Thursday, April 12, 2007

What are people?

This morning my thoughts rambled, as they are prone to do. My choice of music was Avril Lavigne's My World track, which worked some magic in that it cheered me up. So, in my ramblings this morning, I experienced some rather intriguing philosophical meanderings on the nature of people.

"People are inherently made of dichotomies, and yet can never be clearly divided into categories. The divide starts with the basics of male and female, old and young, black and white. But then the mind enters the field, and everything becomes complicated, creative and bromide, tired and inspired, experienced and naive. Really, there is no way to make a generalization about the whole species. Or so it appears.

In fact, all people have these terribly vague things called feelings or emotions, and the expression, or lack, of these things determines another's opinion of you. Some might call these feelings a fault, serving to interfere with the precision that could be man. Others say that these are the core of our being, the source of art and passion and war.

Yeah, I said it. War. Perhaps the most controversial product of human nature. It can be caused by greed, honor, or any of the other artificial idealistic constructs of the human mind. Either way, this phenomenon of violence is, in my opinion, the greatest flaw in our nature. It makes us worse than animals, who kill only for their own need, and worse than nature, which kills out of ignorance. Humanity is on the whole the most despicable thing on this earth, and that is why it deserves only what it has given to the world,
destruction.

However, Art is the dichotomous opposite of war. where one destroys, the other creates. One is profane and blasphemous, the other divine and valorous in it's beauty. In my opinion, art is the only redeeming factor in the equation of our existence. The existence of man."

There you have it folks, my thoughts on man. Where do I fit in all of this? Well, I'm an artist and philosopher, so I merely paint the truth, and attempt to discern it through the veil of lies that the world puts up to obscure the facts.

~ T

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

A Movie For Posterity

The latest film that I have had the joy of watching, I would recommend that everyone see. It rings true with the moral chords of humanity, and it will change your life. The movie I choose to endorse today, is "Rent".

This film is a delicate thing, and it certainly is not an average production. It starts slow, and the presentation as a musical strikes me oddly. However, if the viewer could just bear with this work of art, and endure the beginning, the film proves it's worth. At the end, even I felt an emotional stirring, and I assure you that this fantastic piece can only do more for you.

Some might feel discouraged from watching this film due to the somewhat controversial subjects it speaks on. However, I ensure any prospective audience that the vibrant and hopeful tones of the film will overwhelm any negative concepts within it's bounds.

I sincerely recommend this film to anyone, of any generation, because it's meaning is universal, and it's message of an importance which cannot be understated.

Seriously, watch this film,

~ T

Saturday, April 7, 2007

Candy

Today I watched the movie "Candy", and I come to you bearing my thoughts on it.

The plot was slow to start, and the pacing was in need of work. The cast, although gifted with a big name, gave a rather bland performance. Lots of sobbing and shaking, but not much emotion carried through to the viewer. Near the end, it picks up, and the whole three frames of mind (heaven, earth, and hell) was a nice touch.

My final word is that it's nice to rent, a nifty concept, but it had a poor execution. Rent it for sure, but don't buy it. If you want a better druggy movie, may I recommend Thumbsucker or Imaginary Heroes?

~ T

Friday, April 6, 2007

Cleanliness is next to godliness

Today I took a shower, and for some unknown reason, I felt my mind become stimulated. Thankfully, I took notes afterwards, and I have material for two more posts after this one stashed away. But today's blog has to deal with one of my new plans.

I realized upon finishing my shower today how important being clean is to my motivational process. When I have removed the grime and exhaustion of the past, I am free to undertake any task, and conquer any obstacle. So today, I intend to do just that. I'm going to clean my house, my computer, and the corners of my mind so that maybe, just maybe, I'll be ready to deal with tomorrow a little better.

Squeaky Clean,

~ T